Replace Insecurity with God’s Love

“Love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid . . . this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love."

1 John 4:18 (NLT)

Insecurity ruins relationships. But when you open your life to others, even though they could potentially hurt you, you’ll come alive in ways you’ve never experienced before.

Why does insecurity ruin relationships? Because it prevents intimacy. You long to be close, but you also fear being close. You long to have intimacy with others, but it also scares you to death.

You can’t get close to someone if there’s fear in the relationship. This is why living together doesn’t work in the long run. There’s no lifetime commitment. You never know when somebody is going to walk out.

But fear vanishes, and intimacy—real intimacy—rises when two people say, “We’re committed no matter what. We’re going to make this thing work.”

What do you fear in your relationships? Maybe you don’t want people to find out what you’re really like—so you hide yourself. This is the oldest fear, all the way back to Adam, the first man. He said, “I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid” (Genesis 3:10 NIV).

When you’re afraid, you get insecure and hide who you are. You cover up, not just physically but emotionally. You build walls around yourself and pretend to be someone you’re not.

But while insecurity ruins relationships, love builds them up. The Bible says in 1 John 4:18, “Love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear.  If we are afraid . . . this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love” (NLT). Love takes the focus off you and puts the focus on the other person.

People often ask pastors: “Do you ever get nervous talking in front of a lot of people?” Of course we do! But the minute we think about how much we love our people, instead of being worried about what they think of our clothes or car or speaking style, fear goes out the back door.

But the only way to love others is to realize that God loves you more than you can ever imagine. Suddenly, you don’t have to prove yourself to anyone anymore, and your identity and self-worth aren’t caught up in what others think. Instead, they’re caught up in your relationship with Jesus.

You may have had some relational disasters in your life. Welcome to the human race. But in order to open up to others and fight insecurity, God wants you to first open up to Jesus, letting him fill you with his love so you can share it with others.

Talk It Over

  • How have you seen insecurity harm a relationship?
  • How have you seen love build up a relationship?
  • In what ways have you opened yourself up to God’s love? Ask him to fill you with his love today.

The first step in opening yourself to God’s love is to accept his salvation. No matter what you’ve done or where you’ve been, you’ve got a place in God’s forever family ready and waiting for you. The invitation is wide open. Just believe and receive.

Are you ready? Here’s a prayer you can start with: “Dear God, I know when I die, I’m going to give an account of my life to you. I know I have sinned against you, and I have lived by my plan, not yours. I want that to change, starting right now. I want to turn away from my sins and toward you.

“Thank you for sending Jesus to die for all that I’ve done wrong so that I don’t have to pay the penalty. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I know only your grace can save me, Lord. I could never be good enough to get into a perfect place.

“Jesus, thank you for loving me so much that you took all my guilt on yourself. You made me acceptable for heaven, and I humbly ask you to save me. I believe in you, Jesus. And I believe you will keep your promise to save me instantly, certainly, completely, and eternally. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”

If you prayed the prayer above, please write and tell me at [email protected]. I’d like to send you some materials as you begin your journey with Jesus.

Give hope, prayer, and encouragement below. Post a comment & talk about it.