If you’ve been hurt by someone, whether it’s physical or emotional, you’ve got a decision to make. You can use your energy to get well or to get even.

But you can’t do both.

Jesus understood pain and abuse. When he was crucified, he was wounded in every way possible—in his feet, his hands, and his head. Roman soldiers whipped him with 40 lashes. They crushed a crown of thorns onto his skull. And then they nailed him to a cross.

Of course, Jesus’ deepest wounds weren’t physical but emotional. He was betrayed, rejected, and humiliated.

Yet 1 Peter 2:23 says, “He did not retaliate when he was insulted, nor threaten revenge when he suffered. He left his case in the hands of God, who always judges fairly” (NLT). Jesus could have sent a million angels to fight for him while he was on the cross, but he didn’t.

He left the issue to his Father in heaven. He said, “Father, forgive them. They don’t know what they’re doing” (Luke 23:34 GW). He refused to let pain make him bitter.

To get through the pain and abuse of this life, you must release those who’ve abused you. When you have resentment in your heart, you can’t get well. For your own sake, you need to let go of your right to get even.

Getting even won’t make you feel better. Even if you were able to get even, it wouldn’t take your pain away.

Does the person who hurt you deserve your forgiveness? No. But you don’t deserve God’s forgiveness either. You offer forgiveness for your sake, not the other person’s.

You can also be assured that God has seen everything that has happened to you. The Bible says in Romans 12:19, “Never take revenge, my friends, but instead let God’s anger do it. For the scripture says, ‘I will take revenge, I will pay back, says the Lord’” (GNT).

God saw what happened when you were hurt. And he wept, just as he was doing when his Son was crucified. It’s God’s responsibility to get even—not yours; the person who hurt you won’t get away with it.

But when you forgive, you will be set free—you’ll stop suffering unnecessarily for someone else’s mistakes.

The Bible says in Hebrews 12:15, “A bitter spirit . . . is not only bad in itself but can also poison the lives of many others” (PHILLIPS). Resentment is a poison pill you don’t need to swallow. You can choose to be as happy as you want to be.

So what’s your choice?