Learn How to Be Gentle by Walking With Jesus

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Matthew 11:28-29 (NIV)

Gentleness is important for so many reasons. It defuses conflict. It disarms critics. It’s persuasive. It’s attractive. It communicates love.

Most importantly, gentleness makes you more like Jesus. In Matthew 11:28-29, Jesus says, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls” (NIV).

Do you feel weary and burdened today? Do you want to find rest and be at peace instead? Rest and peace come from being like Jesus—from being gentle. 

You can’t just walk out your door and force yourself to be gentle. Gentleness needs to be an “inside job.” It should be the fruit of God’s Spirit in you. Jesus is gentle, and when you walk alongside him, you’ll learn to be gentle too. 

For more than 30 years now, I’ve prayed the same prayer almost every day: “Lord, help me to treat people the way Jesus would.” Why? Because I am not by nature a gentle person. So I have to let God produce gentleness in my life.

Here are three simple ways for you to practice gentleness with God’s help this week:

1. When somebody serves you, be understanding, not demanding. 
Then next time you’re in a long line at a government office or coffee shop, be considerate—be understanding—of the person who eventually helps you.

2. When somebody disagrees with you, be tender without surrender.
You’ll never get your point across by being cross. You don’t have to back down from God’s truth, but you can treat people with gentleness and respect. 

3. When somebody disappoints you, be gentle, not judgmental.
Ephesians 4:32 says it like this: “Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you” (MSG).  

As you walk alongside Jesus and put these things into practice every day, you’ll find yourself becoming gentler and more like Jesus.

Talk It Over

  • A yoke is a harness that is put on an animal to pull a plow. Why does Jesus’ yoke bring rest, not burden?
  • Have you ever used the excuse that you’re “just not a gentle person”? What other learned traits do we sometimes treat like they are inherent?
  • How have you seen a difference in your life, including becoming gentler, since you became a follower of Jesus and received the Holy Spirit? If you’re not a believer, consider taking that step today.

Gentleness is a benefit of your relationship with Jesus

Gentleness is a fruit of the Spirit, an overflow of God’s Spirit in you. You can’t be gentle without the power of the Holy Spirit. And you don’t receive the power of the Holy Spirit until you surrender your life to Jesus. If you’re ready to take that step, pray this prayer:

“Dear God, I know I’m a sinner, and I ask for your forgiveness. I believe Jesus Christ is your Son. I believe that he died for my sin and that you raised him to life. I want to trust him as my Savior and follow him as Lord from this day forward. I am not by nature a gentle person. Help me learn to walk with Jesus and let your Holy Spirit make me gentle like him. Guide my life and help me to do your will. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.”

If you just prayed to accept Jesus, please email me at [email protected] and let me know about it. I’d like to send you some free materials to help you start your journey with Jesus.


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