by Rick Warren — May 14, 2017
The fear of rejection comes from all directions: your marriage, your family, your parents, at school, at work, from former friends, from disappointments, from criticisms, from just a look. We even have the expression, “If looks could kill.” Have you ever seen one person manipulate another by simply raising an eyebrow?
That’s the fear of rejection! And it can hinder your life in many ways.
The fear of rejection prevents us from giving and receiving love. Past hurts prevent future relationships. We sometimes say, “I got burned on a hot stove. I’ll never touch it again!” And then we apply that to relationships: “I got burned in a marriage. I’ll never get married again!” The problem is, people are not stoves. They change.
Our fear of rejection is based on two things —
First, we all need to be loved. That’s a fact. We do. We all desperately need massive doses of love in our lives to be healthy individuals. God says, “I want to love you.” The Bible says God is love. We need to be loved. And God says, “I want to love you.”
Second, we falsely believe that other people should meet every need in our lives. When we expect somebody else to meet all our needs, we set ourselves up for hurt. We’re setting ourselves up for rejection.
We can choose to put God in first place, because he’s the only one who can ultimately meet all our needs.
Does God ever love us through other people? Of course. Does God want us to love others? Yes. Does he want to use us as channels of love? Absolutely.
But you will never have all your needs met by any person or group of people. God never meant it to be that way. They just don’t have enough love because human love is limited. But God’s love is unlimited and unconditional. No matter how deep your need is, God can fill it. And he never runs dry.